It is Valentine’s Day this week and the V-day decorations are up everywhere.
I don’t know about elsewhere, but here in India, Valentine’s Day is celebrated for a week starting from the 7th of February with Rose Day.
Then there is Propose Day, Chocolate Day, Teddy Day, Promise Day, Hug Day, Kiss Day and finally, Valentine’s Day. (P.S. I just had to look that up.)
I personally have never celebrated all of these days such as Chocolate Day, Teddy Day etc and I kind of find it cringe.
But I do believe in celebrating Valentine’s Day if you’re with your partner.
It’s a day dedicated to love, so why not celebrate it even if just a little to appreciate our loved one’s presence in our life and celebrate togetherness?
Yes, love should be all year round and expressed every day, but there is no harm in giving and doing a little bit extra- extra love, extra effort and extra sweetness for this day.
Who doesn’t love it?
A rose or a small bouquet. A simple date night. A sweet message. A cake to cut together. A small picnic. An extra warm hug.
It need not be grand. True love just requires simple things to flourish.
For me, it’s just the thoughtfulness that counts.
And love, for me is simply thoughtfulness.
It’s also not about always expecting the man to do it. As women, we too can do sweet gestures for our partners first.
I think men like sweet surprises and sweet things as much as we women do.
When me and my partner got together, I was 25 and he was 23 and I was his first relationship.
He had never celebrated Valentine’s Day before, but I had. So I decided to give him a surprise for his first Valentine’s Day and got him roses and a small gift.
He was so happy. Then he took me out to get roses and a gift too, even though that wasn’t really needed. Lol.
I had just given because I wanted to give.
But as much as this day gives excitement and joy to many especially when you’re new in love or if you have a partner to celebrate with, at the same time this day might also heighten our feelings of loneliness, anxiety and sadness if we’re single, have recently broken up or if we’ve lost our loved one.
I remember my teenage years when me and my friends used to be so anxious when we didn’t have anyone to celebrate Valentine’s Day with.
And now that I am in my 30s, I know so many of us might still be feeling the same.
I’ve found late 20s and early 30s to be especially hard to navigate.
There’s your career, a life you’re trying to build through all the highs and lows and there’s your love life. You’ve either found your one or you haven’t.
As I have reached my 30s, I have seen so many of my own close friends who after being together for years have ended their relationship while some have already divorced and some are on the verge of it.
The societal pressure for marriage comes in and you love the idea of getting married and having a partner to settle with.
And when you don’t have it, you feel anxious and feel you’re missing out.
There is also a high chance of marrying wrong or being in a relationship just to cover up loneliness.
And even if you think you’ve found your one, there is still so much clarity needed.
So this Valentine’s day, if you’re in a similar situation, I want you to know that you’re not alone.
It is wonderful to have a partner to celebrate Valentine’s Day, but it is also okay if you don’t.
Let there be no pressure to find love or be in love. It will come when it has to.
Trust that everything will work out for your highest good.
And if your heart has been broken, let that not break your belief in love. Believe in love, because Love is still wonderful.
I have seen many people say that they don’t want to be with anyone anymore, or that they would hate being in a relationship while secretly wanting to find the love of their life deep inside. This way you’re not matching your thoughts and words and I think that only confuses the Universe.
Know that Love did nothing wrong.
Love is still wonderful and you deserve to be loved just for who you are, but first of all, remember to love yourself for WHO YOU ARE and not what you do.
How you love yourself shows up in how you love another.
Be with someone not because you need them in order to be happy, but because you want them to be there to make your already happy life happier.
Be with someone not because they complete you, but because they complement you.
Be with someone not because you fear loneliness, but because you want to share your individual joys together.
Most of all, be with someone because you love them, not because you’re attached to them.
For this, we have to grow and be intentional with our love life inside us.
Work on your inner love life and your outer love life will flourish too.
Ask yourself, if you met you, would you be happy to date yourself?
Would you be happy to be around you?
P.S This was a part from my Mindful Monday Newsletter. If you liked what you read and want to receive my updates, join below. It would be wonderful to have you ❤️
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