I can’t believe I’m writing a post on how to be a Baddie, but yes, I believe we all got to be one.
As an introverted millennial, I think we all can learn a few things from the Gen Z Baddie.
I have many Gen Z sisters who are more like my friends, and I definitely see so many differences between them and me.
They’re more outgoing; they know what they want and can speak up for themselves without shying away.
When I was their age in my 20s, I could never.
But I’m learning, and I think we can all learn how to be a Baddie whether you’re a millennial or a boomer.
But before I start, don’t get this wrong. The internet has a misconception about this word.
So here are some clarifications:
What being a baddie is definitely not:
Table of Contents
Being a Baddie is not about:
- Being negative, arrogant or having the mean-girl energy.
- It’s not putting others down or engaging in petty drama.
- Being a baddie is definitely not being reckless, engaging in bad habits or compromising on your future.
- It’s also not about faking a personality you’re not or copying someone else for validation.
So what is being a Baddie? And how do we be one?
How to be a Baddie
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1. Create your “baddie standards”
The first thing you need to learn from a baddie is to set high standards.
Many of us have high expectations but low standards.
We say we want this, but keep tolerating less and less.
So decide what really matters to you in relationships, friendships, work and how people treat you.
Decide what you’ll no longer tolerate.
For example:
- I don’t chase people.
- I don’t tolerate disrespect.
- I don’t abandon myself to keep someone else happy.
- I don’t constantly seek validation.
- I don’t make decisions from desperation.
- I don’t sacrifice my peace for temporary attention.
Learn to say no and be comfortable walking away if you see that something or someone is just not right for you.
And not only that, but also set high standards for yourself- your own habits, lifestyle and your behaviour.
But also don’t forget to be humble.
Learn to accept your mistakes and don’t seek perfection from yourself or everyone.
Also, don’t use high standards to make you feel superior to others.
High standards aren’t:
“I’m better than everyone.”
Its is:
“I know what is best for me, and I’m willing to choose accordingly.”
2. Be Confident
If you aren’t very confident about yourself, learn to act like one even if you’re not.
That is what a baddie would do.
Yes, you can fake confidence till you become one.
That’s what I see Gen Z doing.
They may not know what they’re doing, but they’ll act as if they know exactly what they’re doing.
They fake it till they make it. And yes, it works!
In the meantime, learn to build real confidence by slowly keeping promises to yourself.
Do what you say you will do and see how your confidence soars up.
P.S. How to build unshakeable confidence
3. Look put-together even on ordinary days
We as millenials are so lazy with our outfits and style, but whenever I go out with my Gen Z sisters, they are all so put together.
They may just wear those ordinary clothes, but they style them in such a cool manner.
They are excited about going out, dressing up and wearing makeup.
This excitement is contagious, and even I, being a non-makeup person, ended up buying makeup items and enjoying this makeup time as a small self-love ritual whenever I go out with them.
So learn from a baddie.
You don’t need designer clothes or a huge wardrobe for this.
You don’t need to copy anyone on the internet.
You don’t need to prove your lifestyle to others by showing off.
Simply create your own style and be put together.
Here are some ways you can be more put together
- Well-groomed hair
- Clean, healthy-looking skin
- Neat nails
- A subtle everyday fragrance
- Simple jewellery
- Clothes that you love wearing
- A handbag and shoes you genuinely love
- A few outfits that make you feel that girl
The goal isn’t to look perfect.
It’s to look like you take care of yourself.
4. Practice Unbothered Energy
This is probably the biggest part of being a baddie.
It’s also the biggest part we suck at usually.
We are so bothered by everything and everyone.
Someone gives you one criticism, and you focus on that one criticism instead of the 30 other good compliments you received.
Someone passes you a comment, and you can’t stop thinking about that.
Someone ignores you, and you think about them all day.
Pause.
You don’t immediately have to react to things and people.
Practice being unbothered.
And one way to do that?
Practice ‘Letting them’.
Let them do what they want.
Let them say what they want.
Let them think what they want.
You take care of your peace and what you can control.
That is the real art of being a baddie.
5. Stop chasing
A baddie doesn’t spend her entire day wondering:
“Why hasn’t he texted?”
“Does she like me?”
“What did they mean by that?”
“How do I make them want me?”
She simply observes people’s behaviour and lets it give her information.
She goes by the principle that if someone wants to be in your life, you don’t have to convince them to stay.
6. Have your own life
We may not realise this, but this is extremely attractive.
Too often we women forget ourselves and get entangled in our relationships and other people.
Our lives begin to revolve around those we love, and we forget that we have our own life and that they too have their own life.
There are so many things you can do for YOU, instead of making your life revolve around one person, one project or one relationship.
- Do your work sincerely
- Give time to your hobbies
- Read books in your free time
- Invest in your friendships
- Choose your routines
- Find what interests you
- Work on your goals
- Learn about building money
- Prioritise your spiritual life
7. Become interesting, not just attractive
Being a baddie isn’t just about becoming attractive and focusing on your style and looks.
It’s about focusing on growth and becoming the most interesting person in the room.
Focus on growth.
Read books.
Ask yourself, “Out of everything in this world, what am I interested in?”
“What would I like to learn more?”
There is nothing you can’t learn.
Learn about psychology, relationships, history, culture, money, art, fashion, society whatever genuinely interests you.
Have opinions and questions.
Learn to hold a conversation.
Be a woman who has a rich inner world.
That is genuinely attractive.
8. Be calm
Many people think that in order to make others feel their presence, they have to speak loudly or stand out in some way through their dress, language or hairstyle, etc.
But you can make your presence felt to others simply by being calm and being your most authentic self.
Where others always speak loudly and over-explain themselves, you can practice how to speak a little slower.
Where others are always acting hurriedly and rushing through things, you can practice being at ease and relaxed.
This is extremely rare and something people will find so different about you.
You don’t have to over-explain yourself.
You simply have to mean what you say.
Calmness creates a presence that stands out truly.
9. Take yourself seriously
How do you treat yourself?
Do you treat yourself nicely and give yourself nice dinners, nice outfits, nice body lotion and massages?
Do you keep your room nice?
Do you sleep properly and take care of your mind?
Do you care to move your body?
Or are you so lazy about yourself that you only care about existing?
If that’s so, you must have already felt that living this way feels so meaningless and boring.
So try something different.
How you keep your room shows how interested you are in life.
How you treat yourself shows how much love you have for yourself.
Practice indulging in yourself occasionally.
Wear nice outfits for no reason.
Decorate your room.
Try eating healthy.
Manage your money well.
Do the work you said you’d do.
Have boundaries and treat yourself with respect.
This is how to be a real baddie.
10. Keep the softness
Lastly, being a baddie doesn’t mean becoming cold.
You don’t have to try so hard.
You don’t have to try so hard to be confident.
You don’t have to try so hard to be independent.
You don’t have to try so hard to be assertive.
You can choose to be soft and let your vulnerable self shine too.
You can be:
soft + confident
feminine + assertive
kind + discerning
romantic + independent
warm + boundaried
You don’t have to become emotionally unavailable to become powerful.
The ultimate energy is:
“I have a soft heart, but I have standards.”
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