Hello Dear reader,
I’ve come for a trip with my mother to Sikkim, India. It’s just me and my mother after a long time on a trip together.
As I write to you from my hotel room, it reminds me of our first ever trip together, to Pokhara, Nepal, some 11 years back in 2014.
It was just the two of us.
I was a college student back then, and my mother was a primary school teacher. We weren’t in the best condition financially, and we hadn’t really travelled anywhere farther than our own state. Going on vacation was something that felt like such a distant idea for us.
To this day, I still don’t know how my mother decided that we would go for a trip.
She had come up with the idea all of a sudden to go to Pokhara.
At that time, my dad was also there, and as far as I know, we were supposed to go as a family- my father, my mother and me, but my dad decided not to go. Maybe they had some arguments.
Anyone else might have cancelled the plan altogether, but my mother decided to go anyway.
Maybe she was just fed up with living the same life again and again.
Maybe she was done doing everything for others and nothing for herself.
I think travelling is a rebellious act. It is a revolutionary act.
To decide you want to step out of your home and your comfort zone, to travel to new places just to see their beauty and leave your daily routine behind requires courage.
And so, we went for the Pokhara trip- just us, mother and daughter, which was something really unusual and even unheard of back then in our community.
Nobody in our family or anyone we knew had done such a thing before. Only two girls going on a trip. But we weren’t scared at all.
We travelled by local bus. At that time, there was no luxury of AC buses or flights for us. I remember sleeping most of the way as the bus rocked through the long, winding roads.
We reached our destination around 2 a.m. in the morning, at a place called Manokama, where there’s a temple my mother wanted to visit.
Our hotel was just an ordinary one. Simple. Okay, just to sleep, but it didn’t matter. We didn’t mind the small, shabby room.
And so, that was the first of many adventures and trips my mother and I would have together.
Now we travel comfortably, but back then we travelled in shared cabs and local buses. By the time we reached our destination, our faces and clothes would be covered with dirt, and when we washed our faces, the water that came off would turn black.
We stayed in low-cost hotels that didn’t even have a water boiler in the room. So my mother used to carry one every time, along with spoons and cups, and we would eat instant noodles using the boiler. We’d buy bread and butter and eat breakfast in the room to save money.
After that first Pokhara trip, I think my mother found her courage and confidence soar, and she fell in love with her newfound freedom.
Even with a crunch for money, she took me on trips every single year, and we covered many parts of India that way.
Travel requires money, yes, but just as much as money, it also requires courage and a willingness to go.
There are people I know who have never left the comfort of their homes. Even though they have high-paying jobs and no shortage of money, they’ve never ventured out or taken trips with their partners or families. They’ll say yes to a plan, but eventually back out, giving some excuse or another.
But travelling changes you.
You don’t know how, but something in you shifts. It opens you up as a person.
The person I was on that first trip with my mom is not who I am now.
That Pokhara trip was the first time I went paragliding- over Fewa Lake. I enjoyed it so much. I wasn’t scared at all. But at that time, I was still timid and shy. I remember not saying a word to my paragliding guide, who took off with me. He tried to talk, but I just nodded and smiled.
There was no screaming, no laughing, no loud excitement. I just sat there as if on a chair, smiling quietly, taking in the wonder of the view from above.
But the person I am now would talk, laugh, and show excitement and energy.
I am still introverted by nature, but travelling (especially solo travelling) opened me up in countless ways.
If you want to feel empowered, you should travel.
When my mother took me on trips, I used to dream of the day I’d be able to take her on trips and be the one sponsoring them.
Now I’m able to do that, and I’m deeply thankful that I can repay my debt of gratitude to her.
I don’t say it out loud, but I owe her so much for that first step of courage she took.
Now, whenever anybody asks how I started travelling, I tell them this story of how it all began with that first Pokhara trip with my mother.
I think it’s one example of how a mother’s courage and actions pass down to her child.
One example of how decisions and determination can travel from one human to another.
When my mother decided to take that first trip to Pokhara, she didn’t just take a random journey. She passed on that courage, enthusiasm and willingness to explore to me.
I think that’s how strength, decisions, and determination move from one human to another through small, brave choices knowingly or unknowingly.
It reminds me of one of Jane Goodall’s quotes:
“Above all, we must realise that each of us makes a difference with our lives. Each of us impacts the world around us every single day. We have a choice to use the gift of our life — to make the world a better place or not to bother.”
And since we’re on the topic of travelling, I believe there are other things that travel too — things that pass from one human to another.
We all know how hate, fear, judgment, and anger travel from person to person.
This is perhaps the root of many of the problems our world faces today. All these negativities are travelling far and wide from one human to another. The world leaders, too, hope that it is these negativities that travel and pass on, thereby creating division, hatred, and the feeling of ‘us and them’.
Sometimes I wonder why negativity has such a force that it never stops travelling, but love and compassion, even if they travel, seem to stop midway.
But that shouldn’t stop us from making love, understanding, and compassion move.
Let’s not allow hate to travel faster than love, but keep passing on what uplifts and unites.
Here are some things that we can help travel from one person to another:
- Belief: A teacher, a mother, or a friend who tells a struggling student, daughter, or friend, “I believe in you,” can change the course of that person’s life forever- planting confidence where there was once doubt.
- Resilience: Have heard of this quote by Brene Brown, “One day you will tell your story of how you overcame what you went through, and it will be someone else’s survival guide.”
- Kindness: One small act of generosity- helping, smiling, or listening ripples outward. The one receiving your kindness learns that they, too, can do the same for others. (40 Different Ways to make someone happy or Smile)
- Leap of courage: After my mother and I took that first brave trip, so many of our friends and family members started going for trips and vacations too.
- Healing: Through presence, touch, or words, your healing and peace can help another’s heart settle.
A person taking therapy can inspire others to do the same. I went for my first Vipassana meditation because I had learned about it from my mother and a friend who had done it before me. It encouraged me to go, and after I went, my friends went too.
- Gratitude: When you share it aloud with your friends and family and connect more on gratitude rather than complaints, it reminds others to talk about the things that they appreciate and are thankful too.
(P.S 365 Things to be Grateful for)
- Creativity: When you create something, you inspire others to create too. I started my blog because someone before me had, and when I did, many asked me how to start one- and they began too.
- Patience: When you practice patience, those around you learn from your gentleness. They see how you choose calm over anger, and it teaches them unconsciously to do the same.
- Joy: We all know how laughter, especially genuine laughter, is contagious. One person laughing and being joyful can make everyone else joyful and full of laughter.
(P.S On Kind Proofs that we have lived) - Dreams: When someone dares to dream big, others start to dream a little bigger, too. During a small research project on aspiration and poverty, I visited slum areas and found that in one community, many parents ensured their children went to school. One major reason was that someone close to them- a family member or neighbour- had completed their education. Just that one example made them realise it was possible for them too.
So this week, I just want to give a gentle reminder that our choices ripple far beyond us.
We are not just independent beings that we think we are. We are deeply interconnected.
We are a mother, a father, a husband, a wife, a daughter, a friend, a colleague, a sibling, a stranger. What we do while playing our varied roles matters, especially what we do as a parent, as a partner and as a daughter or son.
Your courage, your healing, your laughter, and your dreams- they all travel farther than you think.
xx
P.S This was a part from my Mindful Monday Newsletter. To receive my newsletter directly to your inbox, subscribe below. It would be wonderful to have you ❤️
Journal Prompt of the Week
Table of Contents
- What are three qualities you’ve inherited (or absorbed) from your parents- both good and bad?
- If someone were to say, “I learned this from you,” what would you want that to be?
Blog Post of the Week
Quote of the Week
One from Others
“The sun is perfect and you woke this morning. You have enough language in your mouth to be understood. You have a name, and someone wants to call it. Five fingers on your hand, and someone wants to hold it. If we just start there, every beautiful thing that has and will ever exist is possible. If we start there, everything, for a moment, is right in the world.”
— Warsan Shire
One from me
Fill your heart with Humility
Past Newsletters you might like:
Lovely post! Loved how you have related traveling of not just the physical bodies but also things which are not concrete. ❤️
Thank you Niruu.. <3